Shifty
Roast
SICK, TWISTED, AND PERVERTED.
AND WE LIKE IT THAT WAY
The newest stuff is here:
Tell me why are we so blind to see
there is no such thing as a bad shave on a beav?
She rode my crotch and before I left
the pussy it was dry
I was so drunk, and got her number
Misty don't you cry
She took my money at the Strip Club
Broke the bank on our first date
I've got a wife, but I want a girlfriend
To insure that I get laid
Advancing our pleasures I went down for a tease.
But my girl is from Europe, and her muffin
is not tweezed.
When I was young I was invincible
I found myself not thinking twice
I never thought about no crabs
I’m not scared of crotch lice
“I elected to not shit my pants in church, and instead
vomit in the trash as I was having uncontrollable drunken shits on the
toilet.”
“After I go down on her, I tell her I need some water just
so I can go to the bathroom to rinse and floss the loose pubs from my mouth.”
“Most of the time they just wipe it off and stick it in
their mouth any way.”
“Here we are as in olden days,
happy Southern Comfort days of yore.
Faithful friends who are dear to us,
come drink beer with us once more.”
“Some Books I Am Reading: “Scratch that itch!!” and “The
Big Book of Home Remedies” chapter five:
So, it hurts to pee, eh?”
“Doesn’t anybody have a question that’s not about the
vagina shaped birthmark on my forehead?”
“We all sit down to take a crap
Our ass cheeks take a little nap
The turd on water makes a little slap
We call it Potty Poetry.
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