Listen up, fucker. Now, I’ve had enough with you.
The comparison of the fat lesbians to all the women that I have
fucked is over the top, and quite untrue. While some of the girls
I’ve done were in fact, not skinny, none were lesbians, or at least
not at the time. Just the fact that you bring it up, and mention you
thought of it while on a date no less, just goes to show that you
are the biggest jealousy filled asshole this side of Pee-Wee’s play
house. Shifty, just because my left hand has seen more pussy on any
one of many, many wild weekends then you have your entire life,
there is no reason to despair. In fact, you still have the
inexperience to back up that “I’m still a virgin” lie, and then try
to get some pity pussy. So please, if you continue to try your
pathetic attempts to rip on me, I’ll be forced to call a throw down
in our public forum, and show the world, or at least all 6 people
that frequent our site, just how much of a loser you are.
I am really surprised that you would even think about challenging me
to a cut down contest. Shit Roast, we both know the dirt I have on
you. It's not even a matter of me thinking of dirty names to call
your ex-wife, or picking on your small penis and large asshole. All
I have to do is recall the escapades you undertook while living in
Shit Town. I am going to leave it at that for now.
I want you to rethink this request. I mean really take some time and
think about it. Pretend its a big old fat girl and sleep on it, then
go take a shower with it. Then let me know what you decide.
Well, it took a while, but I found myself a big ol fat girl, slept
on her, showered with her, and just for good measure, fucked her in
the ass. And, I figure if I can make your ex-girlfriend squeal like
a pig before a Hawaiian bar-b-que, then I can get the best of you.
Tell you what, just to even the odds a little bit, I'll drink a 12
pack of beer and smoke a bowl before responding to your next 3rd
grade cut down, just to lower my intellect to your level. So, next
time you are able to free your fingers from that high paid male
escort you always have over, try typing something that is up to the
challenge. First, if I were you, I would call your ex-girlfriend and
apologize for all that shitty sex you conned her into. And, dude,
telling a 15 year old that female orgasms don't really exist? C'mon,
she was still impressionable a few years back. Don't worry, I proved
you wrong.
Twice.
Well I must say you have more balls than I gave you credit for, of
course I had only given you credit for one. It's obvious you're not
very smart though, challenging the holy to a cut down competition
against the unclean. Then again I should have more accurately pegged
you on the intell-o-gence meter after seeing the first thirty girls
you slept with. Number thirty-one being that fat girl I had enough
sense to send packing. If she's that fat at fifteen by the time
she's twenty she should be your perfect girl. 260lbs, IQ of 90, and
she thinks you're the only man who can give her an orgasm. Not too
bright there, Humps the Chunks. Let me know if I can still be in
your wedding. I wouldn't want to miss that special day. Light's
turned down low, the smell of pork lingering in the air, flour's
everywhere, tears in my eyes, you trying to find the wet spot while
I video tape.
Fucking yeah right. The last honeymoon video you shot of me seemed
to have a isproportionate amount of close ups of my balls. Get over
it. It’s not my fault I was blessed with a tremendously huge ballsac,
and you are stuck with that eraser-sized pair of pebbles.
Next time, make sure you remember there is a
voice recorder on there and it picks up the operators voice quite
well. I have a hard time sleeping at night because all I can here is
“Dear Good Lord, them are nice balls” over and over again in your
voice. A bit creepy. And since you brought it up, I’d like the copy
I loaned you back as well. I’m not too sure I want to know what you
were doing with it, but I’m pretty sure there is not enough female
anatomy in it for a hetro male to jerk off too.
As far as pleasing the ladies, I have more then
half of my bitches come back for 2nd and 3rd orgasms, even after I
break up with them right after I drop my first payload. They can’t
get enough. I’ll be happy to conduct a survey of how your love
measures up, as soon as you can get an appropriate count of women
that you have slept with.
Honeymoon? When were you ever on a honeymoon? Shit as far back as I
can recall the only honeymoon you've been a part of was the time you
spread honey all over another dudes ass while he mooned the camera
just prior to your gay porn film début. This was back in '99 when
you were trying to break into the porn industry (movie title 'Sweet
Prostate Pie') and I told you that all male porn stars had to do gay
porn before they could do straight porn. And you believed
me.................homo. Anyway I'm glad you don't mind handing out
orgasms to fat women all over town. You're like the sexual Santa who
likes fat chicks. Merry Dickmus to all fat chicks may your pussies
be tight. Whoopie, I'd sleep with a bunch of big girls too, but I
like making breakfast for my ladies the morning after, and I don't
think I could afford the grocery bill.
Shit, bitch. I wasn’t aware that your live in nurse let you play
with “the hot thingies” in the kitchen. This must be a new break
trough for the mentally andicapped.
As for the sexually handicapped (still talking
about you, limpy) maybe you should try to muster up the courage to
approach just one female and try to get some pussy. And I don’t want
any more calls from you in the middle of the night asking if a pussy
will bite you.
And, just to circumvent the next question, yes
you can fuck her in the ass, and yes you should surprise her with it
while doing her doggy style. Shit, do I have to teach you
everything?
I see you are getting pretty arrogant in your old age. I would argue
you are getting pretty senile. The difference between me and you
when it comes to discussing the topics of sex is that I have
actually had good sex, and you are forced to cover your inadequacies
with sheer numbers. It isn't fair that more woman have been
disappointed by you than have been pleased by me. I may not have
pounded as much quif as old "where are the fat women at" Roast, but
rest assured there are no permanent warts on my dick, and I don't
get spontaneous erections when a fat girl bends over to pick up a
Ho-ho crumb that fell from one of her many chins.
